People love them some guac. People pay the 1.75 extra – is that okay? – for guac. But there’s nothing worse than unbalanced, unripened, waste of green magical fruit guac and here’s how to make sure you pick perfect avocados and make perfect guacamole every time.

Like I always say and nobody listens, this shit is variable. Like if you hate tomato, don’t talk to me but also just leave it out!

Recipe

1. The first most important thing is to go to the store and buy ripe avocados. First feel that that there is some give – it’s soft when you push on it. Then make sure it isn’t too ripe. There is exactly one way to do this – that is to lift off the little stem at the top. This gives you a window into the avocado. If it’s brown under the stem, it’s a brown avocado. Check it out here.
2. Cut the avocado in half lengthwise, and take the seed out. Cross hatch the inside with a knife and scoop out the avocado flesh with a spoon into a bowl. Basically, do exactly what this lady does here. Sometimes, when I want a creamier texture, I’ll mash the flesh of one of the avocados in the skin first before I scoop it out.
3. Add the rest of your chopped ingredients up until the jalepeno. Add your seasonings, half a lime, and stir. This is where you want to taste and adjust. I almost always add a little more cumin for warmth and lime at the end. This is the part where the avocados break up and get a little creamier with more stirring – if you like it chunky, stir less.
4. Serve with hella chips, and some peach pico de gallo so they know you fancy.